dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
