Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
