No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
