His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I forget how to act sober
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
