Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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