its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
When are your genitals available?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
