ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
