chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
