FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
