Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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