Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Who died my cat blue again?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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