I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
