No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
