i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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