found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
