There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
