I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
