If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
