So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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