I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize