At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Someone shattered a urinal.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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