Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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