I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
