I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
