I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize