Where is the hickey?
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize