The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
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