He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
