Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
