This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Randomize
