gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Randomize
