Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
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