Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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