is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
3 2 1 whiskey
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
