the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I have already put on my inside pants.
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