I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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