I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
