i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
