I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
