I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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