So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
