Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
