Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Gay?
German.
Pity.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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