ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
