There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
