This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
