You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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