My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Randomize
