I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize