Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Randomize
